In an era dominated by Zoom calls, LinkedIn DMs, and automated outreach, it is tempting to believe that business has become purely transactional—a digital exchange of value for money. Yet, despite our technological advances, the human brain remains ancient. Our biological hardware is wired to assess trust through physical signals and communal bonds, not just email signatures.

While data and competence get you in the room, it is the subtle, often subconscious human signals—the handshake, the gaze, and the shared moment—that actually close the deal. These elements are not just “old school” etiquette; they are the physiological foundations of trust.

1. The Power of Touch: The Handshake

The handshake is perhaps the oldest business ritual, and its value goes far beyond mere politeness. Biologically, physical touch (even a brief handshake) stimulates the release of oxytocin, often called the “bonding hormone.” This chemical reaction lowers cortisol (stress) levels and fosters a subtle sense of safety and cooperation.+1

A study by the Journal of Cognitive Neuroscience found that a handshake prior to social interaction increases the positive impact of that interaction and diminishes the negative impact. It is a non-verbal contract.

• The “Firm” Factor: A handshake conveys confidence and intent. A limp handshake signals disinterest or lack of authority, while an overly aggressive one signals dominance rather than partnership. The “perfect” handshake—firm, dry, and accompanied by a smile—signals: “I am here, I am safe, and I am ready to work with you.”+1

2. The Window to Credibility: Eye Contact

If the handshake is the contract, eye contact is the verification. Evolutionarily, avoiding eye gaze is a sign of deception or submission. Steady (but not staring) eye contact signals two critical business traits: competence and honesty.

• Active Listening: In a meeting, maintaining eye contact while the other person is speaking validates them. It says, “You have my full attention,” which is the highest compliment you can pay a client.
• The Digital Equivalent: In a remote world, “eye contact” means looking at the camera lens, not the screen. It feels unnatural to the speaker, but to the listener on the other end, it looks like you are looking them in the eye. Mastering this simple habit instantly elevates your digital presence.

3. The Glue of Loyalty: Shared Experiences

You can respect someone you have only met in a boardroom, but you rarely bond with them there. Trust is cemented in the “in-between” moments—the shared experiences that happen outside the rigid structure of an agenda.

• “Breaking Bread”: There is a reason the “business lunch” is a cliché: it works. Eating together is a primal communal activity. It lowers defenses and shifts the conversation from “positions” to “people.”
• Shared Struggle: Interestingly, trust is often built fastest during a crisis. Navigating a difficult project launch, troubleshooting a major error together, or working late to hit a deadline creates a “foxhole mentality.” These high-pressure shared experiences prove reliability more than any sales pitch ever could.
• The “Third Space”: Taking a client to a game, a workshop, or a site visit creates a shared memory. Later, when a contract renewal comes up, you are not just “Vendor A”; you are the person they watched that incredible game with. You have a shared narrative.

As we integrate more AI and automation into our workflows, the premium on human connection will only rise. Technology can scale your reach, but it cannot scale trust.

The businesses that thrive in the coming decade will be those that use technology to handle the busy work, freeing up their humans to do what humans do best: look a client in the eye, shake their hand, and build a partnership that creates genuine value.